His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
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