i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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