Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Randomize
