I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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