No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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