i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
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