Kiss
Puke
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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