Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Randomize
