She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
what day is it and did you see me today?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I have aggressive nipples.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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