Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
birth control should be required to get into college
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Randomize
