a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
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