He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
