Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize