I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
