White coat. Heels.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
