yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
