Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
