This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
