I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
