i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize