i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize