I wanna bring you to show and tell
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
Randomize
