your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
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