You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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