If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Randomize
