Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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