do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize