Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize
