Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
