who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
