Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
The uberlube is also flammable
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Dick very happy bro
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
