You can't motorboat a personality
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
