lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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