I just cut my nipple shaving
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I forgot how hot balto sounded
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
