Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize
