just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
