There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
