I want you more than these girls want KFC
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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