But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
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