Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
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I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
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Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.