I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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