So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
