Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
