He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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