i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
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