Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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