I didn't shave. On purpose
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
You're like the curious george of whores
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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