This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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