i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Randomize
