you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
