You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
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